The front-page headline on Variety.com right now:
Nailed it! Ya gotta real future here, kid…
News
JanuaryThursday
This Is Meta: The Wikipedia Article About The Wikipedia Blackout
The English-language Wikipedia was blacked out yesterday as a demonstration against SOPA, forcing us to waste our time in crazzzy foreign languages, but it’s back with a vengeance today, and of course, it now includes an article about its own 2012 English Wikipedia Blackout:
Weeeeeirddddd! It even includes a picture of itself when it was blacked out yesterday inside the now-working article. It’s like when you put two mirrors across from one another and it just reflects into eternity, only not really but isn’t it cool when that happens? More movies should do it.
The weirdest part of the article, though, is the part where Wikipedia – in true objective fashion – had to list off the criticisms about itself:
JanuaryWednesday
The Best Correction In New York Times History, Period.
Say what you want about the newspaper industry, but dammit, when the New York Times makes a mistake – ANY mistake – they own up to it:
Ahhhh, she visualized TWILIGHT SPARKLE, not Fluttershy! That makes so much more sense. Cause when I first read that piece, I was like “Wait, her favorite pony is Fluttershy? Haha, ok! We’ll just have to agree to disagree. TEAM TWILIGHT SPARKLE 4EVS!”
So, best correction in New York Times history, or is this one still the champ?
(Credit to the eagle-eyed Kerri Hicks for the find and @wyshynski for the RT)
DecemberMonday
CHRISTMAS EGG: Google “Let It Snow” Today
What You Should Do Right Now:
1) Google “let it snow”
2) Kind of sit there for the next couple minutes
That’s all. Enjoy!
Thanks for the Christmas Easter Egg, Google! I was juuuuust on the verge of getting some work done. And by “work” I mean Netflixing seven entire movies while leaving a GChat window with a co-worker open. MONDAYS.
(For further enjoyment: Imagine the 35 elite, headhunted Ivy-League grads who spent weeks programming this. Are they hiring? I’m not good at anything, but I’ll just, like, play in their ball pit or whatever.)
DecemberWednesday
Local News Guy Congratulates His Co-Worker’s Boobs, Probably By Accident
Here’s a reporter from 9 News Denver attempting to congratulate his fellow anchor on her (/his) “Hoosiers”, but that is not what he says. Bet you can’t guess what happens!
Behold, the first of what I can only assume will be several videos of local news reporters accidentally saying something embarrassing and that clip ending up on the internet. I think we might be witnessing the birth of a trend here, people:
Ok, we all know what the guy was trying to say, but beyond the boob thing, what kind of a sentence is “Congratulations on your big Hoosiers”??? Who throws “big” before the name of a sports team that’s doing well? It’s clearly ONLY there so he can mess up the next word and have it fit really specifically.
“Hey Mike, congratulations on your new hard, throbbing dong! OH CRAP I meant hard throbbing JOB! God that’s embarrassing! Slip o’ the ol taint. Tongue!”
(via our ol’ pal Eliot Glazer at Vulture)
DecemberWednesday
FUN TIPS: Don’t Try To Mug A 250-Pound Martial Arts Expert
We here at BWE don’t just aim to entertain you, what with our hilarious lists of dogs in cat costumes high-fiving cats in dog costumes, but we’re also here to EDUCATE. Like this quick tip, for example:
If you’re planning to mug someone for whatever reason (like, say, you’re a mugger who wants someone’s money), DO NOT mug a 6’2″, 250-pound mixed-martial-arts expert. Sounds simple enough, right? That’s what this guy did, and here’s what he looks like now:
Whoopz! That’s the ill-advised convicted felon who was jailed after attempting to rob the aforementioned large martial artist at gunpoint. Apparently, if you get beaten up badly enough, you just start to look like you fell asleep on a pile of stamps. As a failure encore, he also shot himself in the ankle during the altercation.
The victim (though, technically he wasn’t really the victim in the end) has asked to remain anonymous, but a photographer did snap this photo of him leaving the crime scene after talking to police:
DecemberThursday
Piers Morgan Calls Patrice O’Neal A “She” During Obviously Heartfelt Tribute
Here’s Piers Morgan on his show last night paying tribute to the late Patrice O’Neal, saying “Let’s take a quick look at Patrice on Jimmy Fallon, remind everyone just how funny she was” (sic).
As someone who constantly spills unchecked content out into the ether myself, part of me sympathizes a bit with Piers, cause I’ve often said some very, very stupid things on this blog that I was quickly and correctly made fun of for. However, as just a person, a much bigger part of me thinks HAHAHAHA LOOK AT THIS WRONG GUY:
At least Google someone for one second before you pretend to eulogize them! Get your facts straight, Piers! I would’ve expected better from a 79-year-old Australian who was in Drive.
(via @eliotglazer)
NovemberWednesday
Your Puny Fire Alarm Cannot Stop Brian Williams From Giving The News
Here’s a video of a superloud fire alarm going off in the middle of a news broadcast, and no, it’s not some random local news station whose predictable technical gaffes earn them some brief internet notoriety; it’s the NBC Nightly News with Brian Williams. But, like a true national news pro, Brian Williams couldn’t care less that the alarm is going off the entire broadcast (and getting increasingly louder for comic effect), and just calmly explains it then proceeds with his first piece on American Airlines.
The only way this could’ve been smoother is if Williams played off the alarm like it was part of the story, being like “It is truly ALARMING how many people American Airlines is going to have to FIRE…”
NovemberTuesday
PHOTO: Zuccotti Park Is Open To The Public Again!!!
The NYPD raided Manhattan’s Zuccotti Park at 2 am last night to clear out Occupy Wall Street protesters (and strangely barred the press in the process). Regardless of your feelings towards #OWS or the city’s ruthless action or the protest-complaints from local businesses and residents, we can all at least agree on one thing –
It’s great that Zuccotti Park is once again open to the public:
WHEW! Finally, the local cops with riot helmets can once again enjoy the benefits of the city’s wonderful greenspaces.
For the record, I used to work in the Financial District and the only local businesses there are two Blimpies that disappear into the earth at 5:00 and a lingerie store called “New York Stocking Exchange” that no one’s ever entered but it makes tourists chuckle on their way to the World Trade Center memorial. Who knew that Big Blimpie held so much sway in this town?
(Thanks for the pic, @ActuallyCurtis!)
NovemberTuesday
Pulitzer Alert: Reporter Wears Grape Costume To Interview Child In Banana Suit
Much like the war correspondent whose gravitas is enhanced by their own fearless decision to interview soldiers on the front line, so too is this local D.C.-area news reporter a hero in his own right — to interview a kid who got suspended from school for wearing a banana costume and running down the sidelines at a football game, Pat Collins has donned a full-body “bunch of grapes” costume.
Every now and then, we witness a tiny flicker that reminds us that true journalism isn’t dead. It’s just now wearing a grapes suit:
Any relation to the long-forgotten Nickelodeon superhero interstitial “Bananaman”? I’ll only accept answers to that question from a piece of fruit in a reporter costume.
