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10 February
Friday

13 People You Can’t Believe Won A Grammy

With the 2012 Grammy Awards upon us and everyone already thrilled for the big Beach Boys / Foster The People / Maroon 5 reunion (finally!), let’s take a second to remind ourselves of something we all already know and complain about every year: The Grammys are, without a doubt, the weirdest and most arbitrary awards show in the entire entertainment world.

To re-prove this time-tested theory, we’ve scoured Grammy’s checkered past and compiled some of its most bizarre winners in a desperate search of some meaning for this odd gramophonic statue. From the awesomely-random to the just flat-out terrible, here’s a list of 13 People You Can’t Believe Won A Grammy:

1. Zach Braff

Without rehashing the internet’s eminent disdain for Garden State, let’s just take a moment to acknowledge that an actual physical golden gramophone was given to Zach Braff for being the “compilation producer” of the third-date-mix that was the Garden State Soundtrack. Nothing against the actual music, but if burning Nick Drake onto cds to impress people is award-worthy, most of us earned that Lifetime Achievement Award by sophomore year of college.

2. Mikhail Gorbachev

The former Head of the Soviet Union won a “Best Spoken Word Album for Children” Grammy for his contribution to a 2004 recording of Peter And The Wolf, though it might’ve been a make-up win after his failure to be recognized for having inspired a decade of award-worthy hilarity from Yakov Smirnoff.

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10 February
Friday

DJ French Bulldog Is In The (Dog) House!

Here’s an exceptionally talented and hilariously indifferent French Bulldog showing off its mad DJ skills alongside its companion (a human DJ – booooring) in this adorable and fake-seeming-but-who-cares double-DJ scratch-off. This is literally the first time in ten years where a DJ started scratching a record and I didn’t roll my eyes.

Any idea what nights this guy spins? Cause I’m totally there. Nah, nah, it’s cool, bouncer, you can let me in, I know the skiing dogs from the Subaru commercial

(via Neatorama)

6 February
Monday

7 Ridiculous Madonna And Kelly Clarkson Super Bowl Bets That Paid Off

Every year, the Super Bowl floods Vegas with hundreds of ridiculous ‘Prop Bets’ – small, specific Super Bowl related side-bets that aren’t contingent on the game’s outcome – many of which don’t actually involve football or sports at all, other than the timeless sport of ‘Kelly Clarkson Belly Guessing’. Here, because we’re slightly more a pop culture blog than we are an NFL analysis blog (debatable), is our Official BWE Rundown of 7 Madonna and Kelly Clarkson Super Bowl Bets That Paid Off.

1. What color will Madonna’s hair be when she begins the Super Bowl Halftime show?

- Blonde (1/4)
- Any other color (2.5/1)

RESULT: Blonde. Madonna went the safe route and just came out blonde, though the crappy 1-to-4 payoff was even worse than the odds for “Will there be a vague Egyptian/Stargate theme for the song ‘Vogue’ which is about neither thing?”

2. What will Madonna be using to start the Super Bowl Halftime show?

- Headset (1/3)
- Handheld Microphone (2/1)

RESULT: Headset. I actually laid $20 on “Literal Silver Penis-Microphone To Generate Random Controversy Followed By Instant Color Bars And Cut To Hyundai Commercial”. It didn’t win, but I really liked the odds at 2-to-1.

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6 February
Monday

The Best Cee Lo Green Moment From The Voice Or Ever

The Voice premiered after the Super Bowl last night, and whether you’re a fan of reality-singing competitions or not, I think we can all agree that this is an image that belongs on tv always (via Muppet Madison):

“The name’s Cee Lo Green – the Cee stands for ‘Cee Me Holding This Cee-at Like A Tiny Bond Villain?”

I know The Voice just started, but Cee-Lo’s team already looks unstoppable. Especially when they get into Meowing ‘Silent Night’ Week, which I believe is next week.

(via Pop Culture Brain)

1 February
Wednesday

The 10 Most Awesomely Terrible Super Bowl Halftime Shows Of All Time

I’m not excited whatsoever for Madonna’s Super Bowl Halftime Show. Not because I dislike Madonna or think that she’ll do a bad job; on the contrary, I’m sure she’ll play the hits and bring out A-list special guests galore and make a giant entertaining spectacle and it’ll all be completely polished and well-done.

The only problem is, there’s nothing memorable or transcendent about ‘good’ Super Bowl Halftime Shows. Prince and Bruce Springsteen each did about as well as a Super Bowl performer could possibly aim for, and both performances still boiled down to just 12 pretty good minutes from musicians whose fans have assuredly seen them do far better 2-3 hour concerts on other occasions. The biggest standout moment was still Springsteen sliding into the camera.

The only time we remember a Super Bowl Halftime Show is when it is memorably bad. That is to say, not Black Eyed Peas “boring bad,” but rather, something so creatively ill-conceived and lame on the massive, sprawling scale that only Super Bowl Halftime Shows can provide, that we can’t help but be entertained, if for the wrong reasons. With that in mind, here’s a look back through the Glory Days of the terrible Super Bowl Halftime Show with this list of The 10 Most Awesomely Terrible Super Bowl Halftime Shows Of All Time:

10. Super Bowl 31, 1997: The New Blues Brothers with James Brown and ZZ Top

HELLOOOOOO Louisiana Superdooooomeeeee!!! Please welcome the Godfathers of New Orleans music: Dan Aykroyd, Jim Belushi and John Goodman!!! Wait, James Brown? That’s not so ba- oop, ZZ Top. Soulful! Definitely worthy of a Fox ‘Special Report’:

This excerpt unfortunately cuts off before ZZ Top’s legendary soulful contribution. And before David Cross hops up onstage with Jim Belushi.

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1 February
Wednesday

R.I.P. Don Cornelius: Remembering The Soul Train / Fresh Prince Crossover Episode

Soul Train host Don Cornelius was found dead in his home today of a reportedly self-inflicted gunshot wound, following years of documented health problems and personal issues.

On this tragic occasion, we’d like to honor Cornelius for his distinct pop culture contributions, but I’d be lying if I said I was more than peripherally aware of Soul Train during my youth, save for one large exception: Don Cornelius’ cameo appearance on an episode of Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air, when the Banks family appears on the 25th Anniversary of Soul Train to honor the place where Uncle Phil proposed to Vivian, culminating with the Soul Train Line and an epic Will vs. Carlton dance-off.

Click the pic below to watch the clip. To this day, the Geoffrey “Point” is my go-to move if I’m too sober to dance:

1 February
Wednesday

Guy Singing At Sonic Drive-Thru Is Annoyingly Endearing

Here’s today’s internet video du jour dot biz, a guy coming up to the Sonic Drive-Thru and placing his entire order in the form of a soulful acoustic guitar song. Surprisingly, the Sonic employee is completely and hilariously unfazed by this, and proceeds to just take the order normally and play along with what could’ve turned into a very annoying experience.

This video is cute, but also, if I saw this dude at a college party anywhere near that guitar, I’d go in the other room:

30 January
Monday

Justin Bieber Will Host Your SNL In 2012, Gurl

Lorne Michaels appeared on Alec Baldwin’s Podcast this week and confirmed that Justin Bieber will host an episode of Saturday Night Live in 2012, and will appear as both the host and the musical guest in the same episode (he truly is the Sting of tweens).

Obviously, this should be interesting; on one hand, Bieber did appear in multiple sketches during his last musical-guest appearance (when Tina Fey hosted), but he also kiiind of wasn’t a great actor (which is to be expected from someone who’s nine years old and not an actor). Still, a full episode of Bieber and the inevitable buzz that would generate does present SNL with an unprecedented opportunity – hopefully he’s as on board with legitimate self-parody as Justin Timberlake always seemed to be.

After the jump, check out Biebs during his last SNL stint as the object of Tina Fey’s middle-aged-teacher desire:

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27 January
Friday

The Best 90s Dance Music Melodica Megamix You’ll Ever See

Looking to get a melodica cover of “Barbie Girl” stuck in your head for the rest of your life? GOOD NEWS!

Check out this amazing SIX MINUTE medley of 90s dance hits all played in succession on a single melodica with true Jock Jams-worthy proficiency. I don’t think there’s any question that when it comes to melodica virtuosos, this guy is The Real McCoy. (Eh? Ehhh??)

This’ll REALLY take you back to 1995. Or to current-day sporting events and Dreamworks movies:

(via Jezebel, Everywhere)

26 January
Thursday

LOL & ORDER: Kid Humming Law & Order Theme Is Legally The Best

Here’s an adorably committed kid humming the Law & Order theme song while accompanying himself by banging a washing machine. It is, without a doubt, the best musical performance I’ve seen so far in 2012.

It’s like a young Michael Winslow meets a young Stomp meets a regular-age Law & Order. Is it too early to crown a Song Of The Summer? Cause I just enscribed that crown then set it on that washing machine.

Law & Order, meet LOL & AWESOME:

Between this video and John Mulaney’s SVU standup bit on Conan, it’s been an exciting 24 hours for Law & Order themed things. Not to mention the 56 hours of actual Law & Order that aired during that timespan.

(Thanks, @haulihan!)