- Apparently, the Rosie O’Donnell/Elisabeth Hasselbeck feud got all third-grade yesterday, when Rosie’s chief writer was escorted from the building after being caught drawing mustaches on pictures of Elisabeth that hang in The View studios. Drawing mustaches! Luckily, security got to her before she had a chance to stand behind Elisabeth and give her bunny ears.
- A source is claiming that Paula Abdul didn’t injure herself by tripping over her chihuahua as she claimed, but instead threw something into a mirror and took a piece of glass to the face. This seems unlikely because who would come up with a cover story as ridiculous as, “I tripped over my chihuahua.” Uh wait, maybe Paula…
- Crocodile Hunter Steve Irwin’s 8-year-old daughter, Bindi, will be getting her own animal show called Bindi: The Jungle Girl, which will feature plenty of archival footage of her with her now-dead father. This certainly won’t be creepy at all.
- After implying that Keira Knightley’s gaunt image caused the death of an anorexic teenager, London’s Daily Mail has been ordered to pay the skeletal star $6,000. Part of the verdict should have been a requirement that she spend all the money on Russian Bear Weight Gainer.
- The wannabe porn star who changed her name to Katee Holmes has created a website that counts down the days, minutes and seconds until she’s deflowered on camera (T-minus 26 days and counting!). Here’s betting she has sex with her partner sooner than the real Katie Holmes has sex with hers.
