Clay Aiken made his Broadway debut in Spamalot this past week, which offically means that the Tony-Award-winning musical has passed The Eff-It Point.

What is the Eff-It Point, you ask? Why, it’s the highly useful term I’ve just invented to refer to the point where a Broadway show that once sustained itself on its story, music, and buzz, finally just says “ahhhh, f*ck it” and starts casting mediocre celebrities in lead roles to bolster their marquee and grab the attention of easily impressed, money-having tourists. Or non-tourists. Pretty much anyone who’s stupid and has money, I guess.

What follows — for all you foolish people who went to college for something other than Theatre and thus likely don’t have a job where you can spend hours writing blog posts about made-up theater terminology — is an extensive (albiet incomplete) list of some of the more flagrant Eff-It points in recent Broadway history:

Rent (opened February 13, 1996)

The Deal: A dynamic, progressive New-York-centric rock opera that became massively successful on Broadway, on worldwide tours, and in the colorful AIM profiles of many people who had never seen a musical without “Miserables” in the title.

The Eff-It Point: August 5, 2002 — N’SYNC alum Joey Fatone is cast in the role of Mark after the director’s original plan of pulling the audience out of the story by having cast members literally go into the crowd, grab people, and physically drag them out of the story, is discarded for being a bit too on-the-nose.

Chicago (revival opened November 14, 1996)

The Deal: A hugely successful revival of Bob Fosse’s sultry Prohibition-era dark comedy results in a 2002 film adaptation and a subsequent Best Picture Oscar.

Eff-It Point: September 4, 2004 — After the Oscar win, Broadway decides to not confuse rabid tourists by having them show up at the theater and seeing actors they don’t recognize; in the musically-nondemanding role of Billy Flynn, Broadway casts Wayne Brady, followed by Huey Lewis, John O’Hurley, Usher, and Bryan McKnight in succession, thus giving adults one detail they can talk about over 10 pm drinks at the ESPN Zone besides admitting they liked the movie better.

(more…)