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20 March
Tuesday

Watch Mr. Rogers Give The Most Perfectly Positive Tear-Jerking Acceptance Speech

Today is the late Fred Rogers’ birthday, and in honor of everyone’s favorite television neighbor and de facto inspirational pseudo-parent, let’s take a moment to watch one of Mr. Rogers’ all-time most touching moments: His acceptance speech after receiving a Lifetime Achievement Daytime Emmy Award in 1997.

I had the privilege of meeting Mr. Rogers in person several times in my life (still by far my proudest name-drop), and he was absolutely as genuine and unassuming in person as his onscreen, seemingly impossibly-positive persona, because that was literally just who he was at all times.

If you can watch this speech without tearing-up eeeever so slightly, I actually don’t even have to finish this thought because that won’t be an issue:

You’ll always be missed, Mr. Rogers! You live on as that tiny sliver of face-value kindness inside all of us ultrajaded adult-children.

20 March
Tuesday

Every Itchy And Scratchy Segment Ever In One Violently Long Supercut

Here’s a supercut of every Itchy & Scratchy segment in Simpsons history, and it’s 48 minutes long. Not sure how this video hasn’t been taken down yet and the user’s family hassled by hired goons (hired goons?), but enjoy it while it’s still up!

For the record, I’m really surprised there hasn’t been an entire episode devoted to Itchy And Scratchy in the Simpsons’ 500+ episode history – lord knows they’ve done enough ‘Simpsons as story characters’ gimmick episodes that you would’ve thought they’d throw one all-I&S ep in there, but I guess that and the entire episode centered around Wendell will have to wait. Still TONS more to cover in the next hundred eps, boys!

Here’s your lunchtime viewing:

(via The High Definite)

19 March
Monday

Jon Hamm Handsomely Takes You Behind The Scenes At The Mad Men Office

Here’s a very comprehensive and fun-to-watch video of Matthew Weiner and the cast of Mad Men taking you behind the scenes at the Sterling-Cooper-Draper-Pryce offices, telling stories about the show’s history, showing off the office’s incredible attention to detail, and looking ahead to the upcoming season. It’s not entirely different from every Mad Men interview you’re used to hearing, but we need something to get us back in the Mad Men spirit with the premiere looming, and that drink I had during work made me pass out for six days (and it was a vitamin water).

What happened last season, again? Cosgrove shot the president? Peggy gave John Lennon the idea for “Imagine”? Don’s penis became Castro? Man, got a lot of catching up to do (although this paragraph was a good start):

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19 March
Monday

The Walking Dead Season 2 Finale Recap: A Real Barnburner

It’s The Walking Dead Season 2 Finale, Episode 13, entitled “Beside The Dying Fire”, not to be confused with the title of one of those Soul CD compilations from a late-night infomercial where every other song is Luther Vandross’ “Here And Now” scrolling by in yellow and you’re like “oops, stayed up til 8 am again!” and you go to work on negative .01 hours of sleep. It’s not that fire. It’s a zombie fire.

The episode opens with a visual explanation of how that horde of 8 trillion zombies congregated and got to the farm, starting with walkers eating a horse carcass who abandoned the horse to follow the sound of a helicopter, then followed more and more sounds until finally their swelling numbers heard Carl shoot zombie-Shane and they turned towards the farm. So, the walkers prioritize following noise over eating food that’s right in front of them? I thought they followed noise because noises usually lead to food? And wouldn’t they have had to stop and find food somewhere along their journey towards the noises? And also wouldn’t they have heard Andrea shooting Daryl days earlier, or Daryl shooting Dale the day before, or Shane’s gun going off, or the motorcycle, trucks or RV engines that are constantly whirring, or the sound of the dining room table being perpetually set?

Ahh, whatever. Trying to keep up with the inconsistencies in this show is as useless as Hershel trying to keep the walkers off his land:

That said, please welcome to the finale EIGHT TRILLION WALKERS:

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15 March
Thursday

HBO Thinks It Canceled Luck But Isn’t Quite Sure What’s Going On

Following a third horse’s death in less than two years of production, HBO has officially canceled Luck. Or at least, HBO is pretty sure it canceled Luck, it’s not entirely sure what’s happening in the show, but it has a general idea. HBO issued this statement:

“While we maintained the highest safety standards possible, accidents unfortunately happen, and it is impossible to guarantee they won’t in the future. Accordingly, we have reached this difficult decision.”

HBO emphasized that it was “immensely proud of this series, the writing, the acting, the filmmaking, the celebration of the culture of horses and everyone involved in its creation.”

HBO added, “We’re pretty sure we were right on the cusp of understanding what this show was about, but sadly, the incredibly long leash we’ve given ultracreators David Milch and Michael Mann has unfortunately run out, choking a fourth horse to death. But we will always remember the taut, gripping drama between vague criminal Dustin Hoffman, totally hanging out there Dennis Farina, those character actors who bet on stuff and said super-insidery horse terms, and grizzled Nick Nolte, who was never actually cast on the show but several of his real-life rants were filmed and included in the series because it didn’t cause anything to make less sense.”

14 March
Wednesday

Flight Of The Conchords Embarks On First-Ever New Zealand Tour Somehow

The semi-retired, now-half-Oscar-winning duo Flight Of The Conchords is embarking on their first-ever national tour of New Zealand, with Jemaine Clement declaring, “This will be by far the most convenient tour we’ve ever done.”

This doesn’t particularly affect me or probably most of us who are a $2,510 flight away from Auckland (just Orbitzed), but I just thought this poster was cool:

It still seems odd to me that Flight Of The Conchords have never gone on an official New Zealand tour, considering they’re the only New Zealand thing that ever comes up when I hand out with my couple friends from New Zealand and constantly shout Flight Of The Conchords stuff at them. It’s like, guys, can we EVER talk about other stuff besides me bringing up Flight Of The Conchords and you being like “yeah, cool, we know?”

It’d be funny if Bjork had never actually toured Iceland, or if Aqua never performed in Denmark, or if The Ultimate Warrior never wrestled in Parts Unknown.

(via The Face Book)

13 March
Tuesday

Will Ferrell And Nick Offerman Appear On The Today Show In Robes Drinking Bloody Marys

Here’s Will Ferrell and Nick Offerman (aka mustache-less Ron Swanson) appearing on the Today Show’s Fourth Hour with Kathie Lee & Hoda – which they affectionately refer to as Today’s “Graveyard Shift” – to discuss Casa de mi Padre, their new Spanish-language fake-telenovela-style comedy film.

Ferrell actually appeared on the Today show earlier today with Matt Lauer, then re-appeared alongside Offerman for this follow-up interview, with both of them wearing robes and drinking bloody marys – a haphazard casualness far more befitting of the Fourth Hour – and it’s much more entertaining.

Ferrell / Swanson tag-team video below:

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12 March
Monday

The Walking Dead Recap: The Shane-ing

It’s The Walking Dead Season 2, Episode 12 entitled “Better Angels” – I apologize for my lack of Recap last week, but I was sick all week with a crazy inner-ear infection (here’s Dennis Hopper’s medication to prove it). I enjoyed the ‘cold logic’ vs. ‘symbolic humanity’ debate, but two parts really bothered me in last week’s episode (and not just cause I was high on meds and kept having nightmares about murders on my block):

1) How did Dale not see that walker?? He approaches a cow with its stomach torn open laying in the middle of a field, with his gun drawn because everyone is constantly on the lookout for zombies, and manages to get attacked from behind by a walker while the camera’s on him in a tight “Horror Movie 101″ shot. Also, did the walker tear the cow’s stomach open, start eating it, then walk away and hang out kind of nearby so it could get the drop on Dale? And we’ve established that the walkers possess regular human strength minus the decay of their bones and cartilage (hence the well fall-apart guy), but one manages to tear Dale’s stomach open with its bare hands while he’s struggling? I call walking BS on that entire scene.

2) Also, how frickin’ unsupervised is Carl?? He wanders into the prisoner’s barn alone, then wanders off and almost gets killed by a walker in the mud, then later wanders into the prisoner’s barn again just as Rick is about to execute Randall. He wouldn’t be that unsupervised in a world that DOESN’T HAVE THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE OCCURRING, let alone one where THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE IS SUPER OCCURRING.

Anyway, onto this week’s episode! And if you liked Regular Crazy Shane, you’ll love the intensely-90s commercial for Shane – Nacho Crazier flavor:

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9 March
Friday

Game Of Thrones Turns Adorable With This Crocheted Starke Family

“Game Of Thrones” and “adorable” don’t often come up in the same sentence without “Opposite Day just started in the middle of this sentence” between them, but this Crocheted Starke Family by Lunas Crafts is about as adorable as a show about constant violent deception gets:

THE CROCHETED DIREWOLF PUPPY JUMPING UP!!! I need that as badly as I need an actual direwolf puppy, which is maximum-need.

Below, here’s the Starke Family Tree in Crocheted form, for practical cuteness purposes:

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8 March
Thursday

Taylor Kitsch Builds House In Texas In Ongoing Quest To Literally Be Tim Riggins

Some celebrities try to differentiate their real-life personas from the roles they play on tv – just as an offhand recent example, Hector Elizondo will always go on Tom Snyder and be like “People always ask me medical questions and I’m like, this isn’t The Chicago Hope!” Aren’t you sick of that happening? It’s like dude, we know your doctor anecdote, Hector Elizondo!

Other celebrities, however, go very far out of their way to literally be that character in real life, which is exactly how we always want to imagine them, it’s just exciting when it actually happens. Today’s example: Taylor Kitsch does a profile in GQ and basically admits to being a real-life Tim Riggins from Friday Night Lights:

The forthcoming story in the March issue also mentions a decidedly Tim Riggins-y fact about Kitsch: that he is currently building a house in Texas, where, in the final episode of the show, Riggins also begins to build a home as well.

“Texas forever … it looks like it’s going to be that way, too,” he says in the interview, referencing a classic Riggins catch phrase.

Perfect! No matter how your film career turns out, Taylor Kitsch, please just keep also being Tim Riggins forever.

You can take the John Carter out of Tim Riggins, but you can’t take the Riggins out of John Carter. Even when he’s on a Battleship.

(pic via GQ)