February
It’s the Top Chef Season 9 Finale Part 2, entitled “Fire And Ice,” a devious move by Bravo to trick people into thinking Game Of Thrones is back on their viewing guide and accidentally recording it.
Obviously, there can only be one guest judge for the “Fire And Ice” challenge:
Just kidding! Prince Joffrey declined because he thought Sarah was acting too much like a spoiled child. The actual guest judge is this old flame:
February
As a huge Star Trek: The Next Generation fan, I didn’t even have to click on the following video to know that it completely confirmed the observation that every TNG watcher is already well aware of: EVERY EPISODE of the show involves Mr. Worf making a very cautious suggestion, Picard or Riker shooting him down, and The Enterprise getting sucked into a terrible situation that makes up the whole episode because they ignored Worf’s very simple advice.
To prove this theory with hilarious, overwhelming evidence, someone has compiled this FIFTEEN MINUTE video of Mr. Worf being told “no”. Only very serious TNG nerds need to watch past the first couple minutes, cause you get the idea pretty quick, but the whole this is greatness:
That is the most thoroughly-proven point in the history of logic. Can we get this supercut-maker onto the Supreme Court asap? Please don’t say “no.”
(via Geekologie)
February
As we continue pointlessly traipsing through these meaningless Breaking Bad-free months we call a life, we’re occasionally treated to a welcome internet respite when someone thankfully re-cuts something Breaking Bad related and lets us close our eyes and pretend for one glorious, fleeting second that another new Breaking Bad episode is less than 7 days away, God willing…
My point is, check out this very expertly done Breaking Bad title sequence remix by jamesmontalbano
Unrelated Sidenote: I would make a comment here about how I miss the artistry of lengthy, Sopranos-esque opening sequences (outside of HBO), but yesterday I just DVR Fast-Forwarded the four-second opening credits of Modern Family, so I’m pretty sure my attention span is long gone and ain’t coming back. Thank God for the internet though! I’m bored of this Sidenote.
(via Onion AV Club)
February
It’s The Walking Dead Season 2, Episode 9 entitled “Triggerfinger,” a double-meaning on Rick & Company literally having their fingers on their gun-triggers, and the current, tightly-wound, “Who’ll shoot first?” mental showdown between Rick and Shane as their various group allegiances threaten to turn inward. Or it’s the name of Sammy Hagar’s next supergroup, we’re not sure. Either way, we WILL see some human faces falling off sooner than later.
The episode opens with Lori unconscious in her upside-down car while a walker ominously paws at her windshield, not unlike a zombie puppy begging for a refill of its water bowl. (Blood bowl? Nah zombie puppies probably drink water, then just eat like flesh milk bones or whatever). This is a very cool scene, though clearly, the writers just really wanted to have Lori fend off walkers in an upside-down car but couldn’t think of an actual reason for this scenario to happen.
Rick, Hershel and Glenn, meanwhile, are still holed up in the local bar after murdering Philly Dave and the Peeman (also a popular morning radio show), and they hear the voices of people who’ve come to look for their disappeared companions. After a tense, silent standoff, Rick decides he’s had enough death for one day and tries to reason with them very verbosely:
Looks like everything’s gonna be alllllllll ri- NOPE everyone’s shooting at everyone!
FebruaryBehold, the Sesame Street-ified Hunger Games logo t-shirt, entitled “I Am The Muppetjay”:
That’s it, right? That’s the last thing. Let’s just pack it up and call it an internet.
I know we have 45 quadrillion more Star Wars variants to come, but I think we should at least get a head start on packing things up here and moving on. You can always just hand me that Wedge Antilles Tropical Skittle Mosaic Porn Parody in person.
Oh, and you can order the Big Bird Hunger Games logo t-shirt at Graphiclab.
(via /Film)
February
It’s Part One of the Top Chef Season 9 Texascouver Finale, entitled Culinary Olympics, and let me just begin by saying, many people have incessantly complained about this season (most notably my mothers’ texts at 11:01 every Wednesday), saying that it’s the worst Top Chef season yet. I haven’t totally agreed, as I believe peoples’ reservations are more a factor of just Top Chef fatigue in the show’s 9th season mixed with a largely uninspiring cast (with one head-and-shoulders favorite who should’ve been named the winner six weeks ago). The challenges, on the contrary, have actually been very good this season, as they’ve mostly bypassed gimmicky themes (Bi-Parti-Sandwich, or “Cook something a penguin would eat!” “I think a penguin would love this braised shortrib”) and arbitrarily-restricting challenges in favor of challenges that showcase the chefs’ actual ability and give them more creative freedom (the “Pee Wee bikes” was a rare gimmicky exception, but at least it wasn’t the Finale).
Last night’s episode, however, was the complete opposite. It was the most gimmicky challenge imaginable, running the chefs through numerous obstacles that 1) Had nothing to do with actual cheffing, 2) Were not the least bit interesting to watch, and 3) Had NO BEARING on the dishes they ended up presenting. It was, in a sense, a betrayal of this season’s most redeeming aspect: Letting the cooks just cook and not having them lose because their sweet pea risotto wasn’t an accurate thematic encapsulation of what The Luxor Hotel is all about.
Anyway, with all that being said, let’s DO SOME RECAPPING! Here are some dumb photos and words:
FebruaryIn honor of Valentine’s Day, we’ve sifted through the many inevitable pop-culture-themed Valentines that pop up on the ol’ lovebox (internet) every year and compiled this cute, puntastic, and extremely loving compilation of The 8 Most Adorable Sets Of TV-Themed Valentines. Click any of the pics for Full Size, and any of the links for more Valentines!
REMEMBER: Forwarding this post to your sweetie legally counts as a gift.
8. Breaking Bad
7. The Walking Dead
By Some E Cards:
February
From the “Ridiculous But Actually Kind Of Impressive” Department (lotta specific departments in lazy joke setup world): In honor of the Simpsons’ 500th episode, two Simpsons fans (who were not me) broke the Guinness World Record for Most Consecutive Hours Of Television Watched:
Jeremiah Franco from Los Angeles, Cali, and Carin Shreve from Acampo, Cali, watched 86 hours and 37 minutes of The Simpsons to break the record at a special event hosted by Fox in Los Angeles that began Feb. 8. Along with bragging rights, the duo took home $10,500 each and a whole lot of Simpsons swag.
Impressive! They’re like two latter-day… Simpsons… tv… watching a lot… people. Damn TV, you’ve ruined my imagination just like you’ve ruined my ability to, uh… to… oh well [Turns on tiny tv]
Below, the two braindead record-setters speak out after their exhausting 86-hour ordeal:
February
Here’s a clip of Tim Heidecker and Eric Warheim appearing on the local morning show Good Day Austin to promote Tim & Eric’s Billion Dollar Movie, rearrange plants, catch footballs, announce the boldest refund policy in the history of cinema, and just generally make things weirder than nice local tv interviews usually are. USUALLY.
I also really enjoyed the host’s completely calm, seemingly on-board acceptance of all the shenanigans. It really is just a good ol’ fashioned Goof-Fest:
FebruaryIn honor of Valentine’s Day and the far more important Game Of Thrones Season 2 Premiere Day (April 1st), check out these Game Of Thrones Valentine’s Day cards from illustrator Chris Bishop:
Cuuuute! Much more adorable than the standard Dothraki classic, “I want to murder other dudes for the right to rape you from behind, causing the person watching this to begin questioning the sanity of their friend who strongly recommended this series to them but seriously stick with it, it’s the best.”
I also would’ve accepted, “Jon thinks you’re swell, and that’s Snow joke!”
Michelle Collins
Managing Editor
Dan Hopper
Senior Editor
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