Because it’s Friday afternoon and I’m delirious, I really wanted to title this post “We finally nailed the perp who ate all that bamboo!” but Michelle reminded me that that was stupid, so I ended up deciding not to post it on the blog. OH WAIT I JUST DID OMG!!!! 2 LATE!!!!!

Some more pics of panda jail to start your weekend off the right way (the PANDA way):

(via Socialite Life)

Eh, not super-naked here, but it beats Us Weekly covers about “Eva’s steamy affair with name you only know from previous Us Weekly covers!” Nice to see Jessica Alba appears to be accepting the same inevitable naked fate.

Also, apologies for the strangely hetero-male posts the past couple days; I’m sure Michelle will be back to dude it up soon enough.

More pics of Eva’s topless jeans somethingerother:

You can check out more of the HalloMEME photos here. Three Wolf Moon and Keyboard Cat are the clear winners. (And no, mine isn’t a MEME, but I’m not going to buy 1284 costumes [read: 2] the same year.)

In other news, Dan Hopper was going to send over a photo of him dressed up as Ace Ventura, but couldn’t find any. So just try to imagine our beloved Dan in a safari uniform eating sunflower seeds, and you’re halfway there.

Now it’s your turn! Link up some photos of your Halloween costumes in the comments (or email us at info@bwe.tv) and we’ll post our favorites tomorrow! So let’s see those ‘tumes.

Don’t even front: You know you all would. This startlingly accurate Antonio Banderas wax figure time traveled to present day from 1994 and placed itself in Madrid’s most famous Wax Museum.

And even though you all wanna act above spooning what amounts to a 6 foot long hairy candle, wethinks placing Waxderas ever so gently in your bed while playing tthe following Nasonex commercial on loop would be oddly satisfying. In a country where “oddly” loosely translates to “extremely”.

Here are those two celebs dressing up like Jon and Kate Plus 8:

I think I might go this weekend as a judgmental blogger who never shuts up then gets drunk and keeps quoting The Simpsons to no one, but wearing a funny hat.

(via Socialite Life)

What do you do when you’re a reality show abortion with 8 peanut sized babies, brand new lips and a slew of paparazzi outside? Put them in little devil costumes and just laugh. Laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh. It’s huhluhluhlarious!!

Wait, only, hol’ up. Babies, why you cryin?? It’s a joke, cammannnnn. Don’t be like that babies! Here, have some candy.

In other news, Octomom’s neighbors? Super psyched about life. The only way we could even forgive this woman for trick or treating is if she rang each doorbell 9 times.

The SF Weekly put on a brave face and did what so few of us literally have the balls to do: Attend The Exotic Erotica Ball, a Halloween of sorts for people who take the “Slutty Nurse” look a lil too far (see: Nipple Clamps, Ball Gags, etc.) In this helpful blog post, they’ve compiled all of the SFW images to come out of the event (more than you would think).

But no image is perhaps as curious, as mesmerizing, as subtly erotic and crotch-tingling as that of the above couple. Oh, you know the type: Mr. “Hangs to the Left” and Mrs. “She Said Whaaaat?!” No word on what look, exactly, they were going for. The “Fat Oscars”? Maybe. “C3PeenO”? Yes. “Gilt Androgyny”? Definitely. “The Public BJ Twinzz”? For a fact. Long story short, we love them. But we will never… ever… unsee them.

Ahead, a handy GIF of what your dreams will look like until you X| (die).

Or the DVD cover for Apocalypto… hard to tell. Say what you will, but Lagerfeld is going to have a hard time competing with this dude’s ex.

(Karl Lagerfeld and Baptiste Giaconi attend the ‘We Love Hair – 111 Years Schwarzkopf’ in — where else? — Germany)

Don’t really have anything against Elijah Wood (does anyone?), just a funny intense picture.

I do have one thrilling Elijah Wood real-life story: Three years ago, my roommate and I went to a party in Brooklyn that our friend was DJing, got there around midnight, then we went over to the DJ table to say hi to our friend and he responded “Don’t worry, Elijah Wood is on his way!” To which my roommate wondered, “Umm…I didn’t realize we were waiting for Elijah Wood?”

Elijah Wood then showed up (no idea who he knew at the party, but I guess everyone knew he was coming), and he hung out for a while and smoked some cigarettes (you know the story’s true cause he’s smoking in that picture). And one of my other friends met a girl at that party and now lives with her.

So, there you go. Elijah Wood: Matchmaker, smoker, party arriver-at. Cuhrazy story, huh?