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23 May
Wednesday

Baz Luhrmann Great Gatsby Trailer Looks Like Baz Luhrmann Directed A Great Gatsby Movie

Great Gatsby Trailer HDHere’s the trailer for Baz Luhrmann’s The Great Gatsby, starring Leo DiCaprio and Care-o Mullgs (I’m on nickname terms with both). Remember when you first heard that Baz Luhrmann was directing a Great Gatsby movie, and you immediately pictured in your head an exaggerated version of what that would look like? Well, the movie is that.

BEST LINE: “You always look so cool. The man in the cool beautiful suits.”

SECOND-BEST LINE: “You just think you’re so great…GATSBY.”

Finally, this landmark achievement in American literature can be experienced THE WAY IT WAS MEANT TO BE:

(via Internet)

23 May
Wednesday

Nintendo Versions Of Radiohead Albums Are The Internet’s First Good Thing

Here are the Radiohead albums Kid A and OK Computer re-created as 8-bit Nintendo versions of themselves. It’s both albums in their complete entirety and you can skip between songs, and it’s pretty much the best thing you’ll hear all life.

I knew if we kept coming back to this virtual flaming garbage heap that we call “Intranet”, eventually it would generate something amazing; it’s like that old adage about a million monkeys working at a million typewriters then killing time from those typewriters by looking at the monkey internet – eventually, they’ll produce a remix of Hamlet shouting Big Lebowski quotes at Admiral Ackbar.

8-Bit Kid A:

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22 May
Tuesday

Condoms Or Diapers Sign Is Amusing And Oddly Meaningful

A Reddit user spotted this sign at a gas station – it’s both an amusing throwaway gag from messing-around employees, as well as an oddly succinct rumination on humanity as a whole:

If you think this sign encapsulates the internal dilemma of human existence better than any hastily-scribbled gas station gag sign ever could, then you won’t want to even IMAGINE the sign next to the different flavors of Doritos…

22 May
Tuesday

10 Sad Cookies Mourning The Death Of “Mr. Oreo”

Sam J. Porcello, the Nabisco scientist credited with inventing Oreo filling and earning himself the nickname “Mr. Oreo”, has passed away at his home in New Jersey at the age of 76. Needless to say, we owe this man more personal gratitude than, give or take, just about every other human who’s ever lived (is that an exaggeration? He’s at least Top-5).

In honor of Porcello’s passing, here are 10 sad cookies paying their respects to Mr. Oreo for his immeasurable contribution to cookie-dom:

1.

Sad Cookie Black And White

2.

Three Sad Cookies

3.

Sad Cookie Dots

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22 May
Tuesday

Three-Headed Giraffe Hopefully Involved In Game Of Thrones Finale

Egads, the LEGENDS WERE TRUE – behold, the mythical THREE-HEADED GIRAFFE:

Three Headed Giraffe

Ah, it’s just three giraffes standing together in an improbable way. Or is that just EXACTLY WHAT THE GIRAFFE-HYDRA WANTS US TO THINK BEFORE IT STRIKES WITH ITS POISONOUS RAZORTEETH AND TURNS ALL OF HUMANITY INTO ITS REALLY-HIGH-UP LEAVES?????

It’s just like the movie Congo! Wasn’t there a three-headed giraffe in Congo? No? That movie was so haphazard I probably wouldn’t have noticed when I watched it on HBO seven times every afternoon during summer vacation. “Stop eating my sesame cake, three-headed-giraffe!” is a line from the movie that was cut.

Anyway: Three giraffes, almost as cool. Also they all have snakes for tails, you just can’t see it in this pic.

(pic via Splash News)

22 May
Tuesday

Gotye Only Exists So We Can Watch Videos Of Babies Dancing To Gotye

Baby Dancing To GotyeThe internet seems to be aflush with “kid-ized” Gotye videos these days (if ‘aflush’ isn’t a word, then pretend I said ‘fullerino’), where parents keep filming their kids singing or dancing to “Somebody That I Used To Know” in the hopes of sharing their hilariously spontaneous love of synthy breakup songs for the internet’s welcoming amusement.

It’s basically at the point now where I’m preeetty sure Gotye only ever existed to give kids an opportunity to be filmed dancing to Gotye, marking the most forward-thinking viral-marketing moment in music history (or at least, ever since Rick Astley foresaw the internet existing eventually and recording that hilarious psyche-out in the late 80s and being like, “You’ll understand this in 20 years…”)

My point is, let’s all watch this adorable and great video of a baby dancing to Gotye:

Check out two more videos proving the above thesis over at Strollerderby.

21 May
Monday

WANT: Carl’s Jr. Ice Cream Burger

Orange County area Carl’s Juniors have begun circulating a new test item – a hamburger-shaped combination of ice cream ‘meat’, sugar cookie ‘buns’, and ‘ketchup and mustard’ icing, known as the “Brrrger”, which is either a pun on the coldness of the burger or it’s just Fabio from Top Chef saying “burger”:

Carls Jr Ice Cream Burger

Well, obviously I want one of these, but I also want every burger and/or every ice cream thing in my field of vision at all times, so I’m not sure that counts as an endorsement so much as just ‘seeing a thing’.

On second thought, the concept is maybe a little gross? On third thought, I want it again.

(Foodbeast, via HuffPo)

21 May
Monday

PROVEN: The Entire World Knows The Fresh Prince Theme Song

Will Smith Fresh Prince Theme England

Here’s Will Smith appearing on the Graham Norton Show in England to discuss still being recognized to this day primarily from Fresh Prince, then proving this theory by organizing a giant group singalong to the Fresh Prince theme, and everyone in the audience ( / world) knows every single word.

I recall once having an argument with friends about what song the most people in the world know all the words to, and I lobbied hard that amongst our general age group, the Fresh Prince theme had to be right up there, if not #1. I’m glad this video seems to have finally proven that, so take note, whoever I was arguing with that night (college friends and/or a Yorkie I was dogsitting one weekend in ’03 while watching Fresh Prince reruns):

(via Viral Viral Videos)

21 May
Monday

Game Of Thrones Recap: Two Princes

Game Of Thrones Mud Gate

It’s Game Of Thrones Season 2, Episode 8 entitled “The Prince Of Winterfell,” a reference to the possibly-burnt ‘Prince’ Bran (aka “The Even Younger Wolf”) and his brother Rickon (aka “The Wolf Who’s Constantly Eating Wolfnuts”), who’ve yielded Winterfell to its current ‘Prince’ Theon (aka “Dick Wolf”).

Theon’s sister Yara arrives in Winterfell to ridicule Theon and confidently sit in chairs:

Yara tries to convince Theon to leave Winterfell before Northern forces instantly slaughter him, but when Theon stubbornly refuses, Yara tells him the touching story, “When you were a baby, you used to scream all the time. Also, you couldn’t walk, speak, or understand things, and now, you’re four times larger and can speak and walk upright and are an adult. My point is, if you’re gonna get obviously killed because you have no idea what you’re doing, at least do it closer to the sea so we can have a traditional Pyke Funeral with squid pallbearers in tuxedos.”

Over at Camp Robb, Jaime Lannister has escaped in the custody of Brienne, making for the show’s first official Tally-Smally couple, not unlike a reverse Chris & Adrienne Bosh. Needless to say, Jaime is slightly confused when his blindfold is removed:

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18 May
Friday

The 15 Lamest Bands With Really Intense Names

We haven’t done a random ‘music argument’ list in a while, so here’s a topic for discussion: Really lame bands with really intense band names. As in, bands whose actual music doesn’t live up to the aggressiveness, violence, or intensity implied by their band name, often to hilarious degrees.

A CRUCIAL DISTINCTION: “Lame” does not necessarily mean “Bad”. I enjoy many of the bands on this list – I enjoy Billy Joel too, for example, but Billy Joel is overwhelmingly lame, and these things are not mutually exclusive.

Here are The 15 Lamest Bands With Intense Names, ordered by increasing discrepancy between “Name Intensity” and “Music Lameness”, using official science:

15. Five For Fighting

The band name connotes “Five Minutes” for a fighting penalty in ice hockey, or just five people who are “for” fighting, two concepts that are both slightly incongruous with the ever-so-whinily delivered lyric “Only a man in a funny red sheet / Looking for special things inside of me.” THEM’S FIVETIN’ WORDS! (That means starting five fights)

14. Savage Garden

sav·age – adjective

1. fierce, ferocious, or cruel; untamed: savage beasts.
2. uncivilized; barbarous: savage tribes.
3. desiring to stand with you on a mountain, bathe with you in the sea, live like this forever until the sky falls down on me.

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