Welp, leave it to science to prove what we’ve all suspected for years, just not quite this literally – The more time you spend on the internet, the less likely you are to get a woman pregnant:
A team of Argentine scientists led by Conrado Avendano of the Nascentis Center for Reproductive Medicine in Cordoba found that placing drops of semen from healthy men under a laptop connected wirelessly to the Internet kills or maims the little swimmers. [Ed Note - Can we never call them 'the little swimmers' ever ever again? Thx!]
After four hours next to the WiFi-connected computer, 25% of the sperm had stopped moving and nine percent showed DNA damage.
Semen placed under the computer without the WiFi connected did not experience significant levels of sperm damage, the study says.
Well, there you have it – the internet kills sperm. I think we all could feel the internet slowly killing us, we just weren’t sure exactly which part, but now we know! Though technically the WiFi signal kills sperm, not the actual internet itself; the only thing the internet kills is motivation, physical fitness, and all joy.
