Jon Gosselin’s ex-jump-off Hailey Glassman has been desperately trying to stay relevant in a world where the Gosselin’s are pretty much over and done with. Her latest attempt is by posing on the cover of the Jersey Shore cast’s favorite news source, Steppin’ Out Magazine, discussing in great detail the size of Jon’s philandering phallus. And maybe the reason why he’s so good at making babies is because his penis is the size of one’s:
“He’s hung like a nine-year-old boy,” she snipes. “I’m serious. This is true,” she adds, even claiming he measures up to “… He said, ‘You know how subconscious [sic] I am of down there,’” Glassman recalls. She admits she wasn’t very sensitive about the topic. “I would tell him to his face, ‘I don’t think you would cheat on me because you’re so small.’ I would tell him that all the time.”
We got to thinking… 3 inches is pretty small… so small, in fact, that we had trouble picturing what Jon Gosselin’s penis must look like. Here are 10 things we think Jon Gosselin’s penis probably looks like:
10. Megan Fox’s Thumb
9. A Poached Egg
8. Simon Cowell’s Nipple
7. A Newborn Bird
6. An Austrian 2mm Pinfire Miniature Gun
5. The Old Lady’s Hand in Titanic
4. An Asian Baby
3.A Lego Pip Brick
2. Ed Hardy’s Penis
1. A Vagina
What do you think Jon Gosselin’s penis looks like?
