- America’s Favorite and Only Pregnant Man Thomas Beattie gave birth to his second child yesterday, a baby boy. The father and son plan a long life of playing catch, fishing, and attending Lamaze classes together.
- Jessica Alba has apologized for vandalizing downtown Oklahoma City with posters of a shark on it. So for those fellas interested in luring this lovely lass into your bedroom, might we suggest buying this.
- George H.W. Bush was snapped playing Former Presidential Santa to a dancer in a bikini. And because the photo says more than we ever could, we’ll leave it at that.
- Good news for the little star of Slumdog Millionaire: Producers of the film have bought her family a small apartment after their Mumbai house was destroyed. Expect the story to be documented in the film’s sequel, Slumdog 250-Sq.-Ft.-1-Bedroom-Apartment-aire.
- Britney Spears is coming back to America with her Circus tour! Will I be brave enough to head back into the ring after throwing up at her show in Newark thanks to some tainted chicken fingers? YOU BET I WILL.
