Last night was the half sorta final for Glee, which is taking a 4 month hiatus and returning in April of 2010. Sobbing and rocking ourselves aside, can we talk about last night’s mid-season finale? Because four for you, Ryan Murphy, you have done it again.
Without giving you one of our typical, long-winded recaps, let’s glaze over the plotpoints: The kids go to sectionals, and Will can’t come, because he wanted to sleep on a free mattress in the high school. (This seems like a fair compromise.) So Mrs. Pillsbury goes with them. Then, the school for the deaf and school for underprivileged booty ladies steals their entire set list via Sue Sylvester, replete with wheelchairs. What can we say, even for a silly show about singing teenagers we found this a bit hard to swallow. How could they even afford those fancy wheelchairs??
Finn finds out about Quinn’s secret: That he’s not the father of her baby, rather it’s Puck. He quits Glee. He then rejoins Glee and makes the team win. They rewrite their entire performance, replete with strangely rehearsed dance numbers, and make a go of it, including Rachel’s performance of “Don’t Rain On My Parade,” which was Barbara to a T:
They go on to sing “You Can’t Always Get What You Want,” and, we assume “Somebody to Love.”
It becomes clear that the kids win, even though we never see them accept their award. Perhaps Murphy realized this would take away from the real victory when they obviously go on to win regionals, so all we get is a cute trophy presentation to Mr. Schue at the end. Oh, did I mention he left his wife? Well now would be a good time. Credit to Matthew Morrison: His dramatic scenes are pretty much our favorite of any he’s in.
Sue Sylvester is found out and Principal Figgins suspends her. Good to know that during this 4 month hiatus we won’t be missing any of her razorsharp retorts, while she browns herself in Florida somewhere.
OK, big finale time. THE ULTIMATE LOOSE END. We know his marriage is over, Finn and Puck aren’t talking, Sue was reprimanded. BUT WHAT OF MS. PILLSBURY? The wedding? It’s off. She had to reschedule to accompany the kids to Sectionals and Ken fled. (Thank God.) She pours her heart out to Will while wearing a wedding gown — it’s the “Say Yes to the Dress” I’ve always dreamed of! — telling him she DID in fact do it for Will and not the kids. She loves him and is heartbroken. When he makes his first move — touching her elbow length white glove — our hearts jumped. But she, a lady if nothing else, elegantly strokes his neck while making her exit.
So, Trophy. The kids give it to Will. They then sing him a great Kelly Clarkson song, “My Life Would Suck Without You”, incorporating the dance moves from the entire season. And that’s when we first noticed it: THE SPARK IN MR. SCHUESTER’S EYE. And, well, I think we ALL know what happens next… PROFESSIONAL FLAILING.
VIDEO AHEAD.
I’m not the biggest fan of this coupling, per se, but HOW CAN YOU NOT JUST DIE INSIDE IT IS SO ADORABLE AND SWEET AND HOT. Where do these hallway sprinting men exist? Right, they probably don’t. No, no you’re right. *sob*
So thank you once again to Ryan Murphy and all of the Glee-ple who made this such a satisfying half year finale. You can watch the episode here.
The only thing we ask is that we, as a people, finally retire the song “And I Am Telling You.” No matter how good you are, you’ll never be as good as Jennifer Hudson or Jennifer Holliday. We love you, Mercedes, and we know it’s not your fault. We almost wonder if the song “And I Am Telling You” would ever sing the song “And I Am Telling You” if it read this paragraph. Sadly, you need to be going.
One final thing: If you’re looking for that perfect gift for Mom — and no, I’m not being paid to say this — the Glee soundtrack is it. I downloaded almost all the songs (save the Schuester Raps) (OK, those too) off Itunes and burned them for dear Mother (along with some Lady Gaga natch) and it’s a big hit. Enjoy.
Did I say one final thing? Because this is really it. How much did Sirius Radio Host and friend Derek Hartley look like Kurt in high school??? IT BAFFLES:
I want to hold both of them in my teenage arms, they are too much.
