Ashlee Simpson, fresh off being fired from her supporting role in the CW’s Melrose Place, has landed the role of Roxie Hart in Chicago on Broadway.
Allow me to break down that sentence, in case any of my theater major brethren out there still have delusions of grandeur about where “theater” ranks on the totem pole of legitimate American art forms.
Ashlee Simpson:
- Is NOT good enough to play a limited side-role in remake of camp 90’s prime time soap opera airing on television’s fifth network.
- IS good enough to play the lead role in a revival of a Tony Award winning musical both in New Yorkand in London, the two most prominent cities for theater in the world. She likely receives rave reviews from a theater community with such low expectations for her talent and so constantly desperate to make ends meet, they can’t bear to endanger the “tourists have heard of it” cash-cow that is Chicago.
Long story short — I think I burned my theater degree a couple years ago, but I’m gonna try to track down the ashes and pee on them.
