- Josh Duhamel slept with a stripper who also looks like she enjoys a slice of meth pie every now and again. So good news for you, comely young meth heads!
- Tyra Banks featured a guest on yesterday’s episode who has two vaginas. Two vaginas? How convenient! You can use one for all the “fun” stuff, and keep the other one handy for laundry quarters.
- In related news, Oprah has announced she will be giving up her syndicated talk show in 2011. That thud you just heard were the spirits of every man, woman and child committing suicide.
- Kevin Federline’s girlfriend is pregnant. Good to know trans fats don’t have any effect on what appear to be super human sperm.
- Sharon Osbourne claims that homely songstress Susan Boyle looks like a “hairy a**hole.” If only our collective anes had a voice like that, we’d literally all be sobbing wrecks after a hearty bowl of oatmeal.
- Jim Carrey is going to be a Grandfather! Which will finally give him an excuse to chase small children around the Thanksgiving table with “the claw” without seeming, you know, creepy.
- Mariah Carey was spotted shooting her music video for H.A.T.E.U. wearing a sexy, figure revealing bathing suit on a beach. The shoot was stopped briefly midway through when someone rolled her back in! Tip your waitress.
