Hey everyone, I’m stepping away from BWE for two weeks to do this:
That’s right – I’m gonna be watching the movie Eurotrip.
Hopefully, the trip can prove as fruitful to BWE as my vacation last year, which netted a bunch of goofy signs. Also, I got 4.1% worldlier. One can only dream.
Because I’m gonna miss some semi-important pop culture events, I’ll just tell you my predictions now so that when they happen you’ll feel like we’re totally hanging out:
- Two more people who aren’t Kevin, Jen, or the Voltaggio Brothers will be eliminated from Top Chef. My brain will later thank me for not wasting the minutes of life that this would require.
- Jim And Pam will get married. Andy will sing some a Capella at the wedding (literally the one thing I’m gonna try to somehow catch overseas. I guess the internet? Can the internet do that?)
- The Seinfeld ‘reunion’ will happen on Curb. Michael Richards and the Blacks will get along terrifically.
- For the Entourage finale, I just gots two words for ya: BOOBS and MORE BOOBS, am I right guys????? HIGH FIVE!!!! KEGSTAND!!!!! HIGH FIVE ME WITH THE KEG!!!!!!!
- Christoph Waltz will win the Oscar for Best Supporting Actor. I’m not going to be away for the Oscars, but this will simply remain the truth while I’m gone.
- Hank will be the new American Idol, only more so.
That’s all for now. In the meantime, I’ll just re-save a bunch of old things for next week, and hope no one will know the difference. (The Falklands have just been invaded. I REPEAT: The Falklands have just been invaded! The disputed islands lie here…)
And if that’s not enough to cover my absence, just poorly Photoshop a mustache onto Ben from Lost and call it a thing. The sensation will be surprisingly identical.
