After viewing this Heineken ad featuring the Biz Markie song “Just A Friend” about 75 times during the NFL Draft this weekend, I started getting pissed off. Not because the commercial itself is bad, or that I have anything against the anti-drunk driving message, but I just wonder why showing a bunch of obviously hammered young people shouting along to a song in the back of a cab is perfectly ok to air on national television in the afternoon, whereas the ONLY MENTION of marijuana in any commercial context is to inform you that it will kill you (or make you melt into a couch, or turn your dog against you, etc.)

It’s awesome that a company can be mature enough to basically say “look, we all get hammered, it’s fine, just don’t drive home,” but we can’t apply one percent of the rationality behind this commercial towards marijuana usage?

Could you imagine if McDonald’s aired a commercial where four obviously high dudes were sitting on a couch, red-eyed and laughing, then finally gathered the courage to walk up the street to McDonald’s to order eight 20-piece McNuggets while laughing at the Madagascar 2 Happy Meal standee? Not only would the commercial never be allowed to air, but if any element of a mainstream commercial implied being high in the slightest positive or even tongue-in-cheek light, the ad would inspire protests, get pulled from the air immediately, and the company would have to issue a public apology and donate money to an anti-drug organization in the name of a little girl who got hit by a stray bullet during a busted crack deal in Little Rock in 1998.

I honestly don’t even smoke pot, I just get pissed off that in 2009, we still haven’t been able to overcome this childish double standard — Look! They’re drinking alcohol but managing to have fun and act responsibly! POT WILL MAKE YOUR BABY SISTER JUMP INTO A SWIMMING POOL AND F***ING DIE IMMEDIATELY!!!