I sometimes wonder if all the “Wacky Newzz” features on websites simply give us more access to ridiculous news stories, or if the existence of these features actually inspires criminals to go out of their way to commit the most bizarre crimes possible.
Long story short, a dude was arrested for stealing a shark and an eel — note the cryptic last line in this story and its Troy McClure-like fish-fetish implications:
30-year-old Long Island native Elbert Starks was arrested yesterday for allegedly shoplifting a live shark from Total Aquarium in Lynbrook. Police say the heist took place last month, when Starks—a sex offender on probation—grabbed a $350 nurse shark from a tank, put it into his jacket, and drove it to a new home in his apartment’s aquarium. (The shark survived!) Starks is also accused of using a credit card stolen from another pet shop to buy a 2-foot-long green moray eel for $300, which he put in the tank with the shark. An employee tells the Post, “This guy obviously has a thing for fish.”
Not to state the obvious here, but how the hell does someone successfully steal a live shark? Is this dude a Carmen Sandiego villain? Someone better go check and make sure he hasn’t taken the Lincoln Memorial too.
Also – I normally don’t like to copy-paste this much straight text from someone else’s website, but I’m sorry, that story just kept getting better and better.
(Thanks, Gothamist)
