- Steve Martin and Martin Short were snapped fooling around in the ocean while on vacation in St. Barts. And you wanna know what? They don’t look half bad! (Look, take it easy, I said half. Whaddya want, the guy’s in his 60s. He looks aight!)
- Singer Lily Allen claims that people never focus on the benefits of taking cocaine. For example, have you ever spilled some of your kid’s grape juice on the floor, but have no papie towtows around to pick it up? Why, just sprinkle a handful of the ol’ Dr. Zhivago on it and watch that stain disappear! It truly is a miracle powder.
- The new season of Celebrity Apprentice will feature contestants Joan Rivers, Dennis Rodman, adorable ice skater Scott Hamilton, comedian Tom Green, Khloe Kardashian, and Andrew Dice Clay. In other words, the new season of Celebrity Apprentice will be unstoppably amazing while also proving that God is merely the figment of a universal imagination.
- SHOCK: It has been revealed that the creator of the Barbie doll was a 70s sex addict and swinger with a raging case of gonorrhea. But the things that man could do with his smoothly rounded crotch nubbin…
- Queen Latifah is giving fans a chance to write a song for her new album. Do you think she’s ever heard the song “Top That!”? Because I will gladly resubmit it.
