- Cheech and Chong will reunite for their first comedy tour in over a quarter century. Only now instead of weed they’ve moved on to heroin, and their show is a lot more nihilistic.
- Kate Hudson and Lance Armstrong have broken up. Let’s spin the Wheel of Actresses Who Are Always Dating Really Publicly to see who Lance will end up with next — looks like it’ll be… Drew Barrymore!
- Keira Knightley has refused to have her publicity stills for The Duchess altered to give her more cleavage. I might not see that movie now.
- Jack White and Alicia Keys have recorded the theme for the new James Bond movie Quantum of Solace. In a related story, the Grammys will not occur this year, and 220 award statues will be given to this song.
- And finally, Ron Wood has broken Keith Richards’ longtime reign as the Most Undead Rolling Stone.
