So. My first day of going Vegan with Ms. Oprah Winfrey has so far been a challenge. Yesterday, I vowed to join Oprah on her quest for a 21 day detox of not only going vegan, but also cutting out alcohol, sugar, caffeine, and a torah scroll full of other delicious things that I was sure I could live without. Sure, I don’t have a personal trainer, I scrawled on my own arm, and yes, my definition of personal chef is buying canned ravioli at the drugstore (Boy-are-[they]-dee-licious). But hey! I’m an adult competent lady who could do anything!
And then I went to the Yankee game. Oh, and it was good. Look, I’m a Marlins fan at heart (boo, hiss, I know), but when a team’s hot-headed manager gets ejected following a highly entertaining hat-stomping display, and then the home team goes on to win in the bottom of the ninth… well, there’s really only one way to celebrate: With ounces upon ounces of light beer. I’m normally not a beer drinker, preferring instead any drink that will onset adult diabetes (molasses-tini with a butterscotched rim for the lady, please.)
But I figured, if I’m going to break Oprah’s written rules, at least I’ll leave sugar out of it, right? So Bud Light it was, and ay, it was sweet. But as far as ballpark food goes, the distinct aroma of hot dogs has never displeased me more. And if you’ve ever seen how hot dogs are put together on How It’s Made, my favorite show in the entire world, trust me, the Oprah diet begins to make more and more sense. (Picture hot pink paste being shoved into a condom. That has nothing to do with hot dogs, but what an image, amirite?)
If only I had a personal chef to hand feed me much like this little rejected baby penguin, perhaps things would be easier then.
After the jump… how hot dogs are made. I will watch this 25 times before attending any Cape Cod Memorial Day BBQs, because lawd hammercy, this will not be easy.
