Your editors were too busy playing Wii in the conference room today (Michelle beat me at Tennis, but barely) to pull any daytime TV off the TiVo for your Unemployment Check viewing pleasure, so please accept this substitute in the form of the Onion News Network’s latest funny report, this time examining Time’s “Least Influential People of 2007″. So screw you John Mayer, I’m PROUD to be part of the 299 million people who don’t actually matter!