It was reported today that Britney Spears, clean-shaven, sober, and hopefully keeping her food down, has met a new love interest at the Promises rehabilitation clinic:

Spears, 25, has fallen for Jason Filyaw, the 33-year-old lead guitarist of the rock band Riva, reports the tab…

Spears emails and phones Filyaw constantly, according to the report, and the two have pet names for one another: he calls her Sugar, Kitten and My Lady; she calls him Mr. Secret Underground Guy and J-Sun.

before we delve into her new love, just a quick word to stage moms out there: the lack of a formal education really does effect ones smarts. While his pet name are generic, at least they are pet names, short and sweet. As far as we know, Mr. Secret Underground Guy is more of just a straightforward, if not wordy, personality round-up, and J-Sun sounds exactly like Jason.

But just who is Jason “Mr. Secret Underground Guy” Filyaw? He’s the lead singer of a band called Riva — no relation to our orthodox Jewish Russian ancestors, we hope — who according to their Myspace page “We are Riva. We f*cking rock.” Poetic but concise. Jason’s page tells us a little more about him. He’s a 6′3″ Native American who likes everything “from Mozart to Slayer”, enjoys “sex” and “writing porn music”, and appreciates a good old lady face kicking every now and again.

Dare we say it, but this seems to be a match made in mongoloid heaven.