1. The people have spoken, and thus it shall be so: in the future, Eddie Murphy will act in every role of every movie, utilizing the miracle of prosthetics to portray human beings of all different body shapes and sizes (especially hilariously obese – and usually angry – black women) to the delight of moviegoers far and wide. Simply put, we want – nay, demand! – more fat suits – $33.7 million

2. Despite having no stars and no significant marketing campaign, simply having the word “Hannibal” in the title of a movie seems to guarantee at least a #2 opening at the box office. Coming next summer: Fat Hannibal, starring Eddie Murphy – $13.4 million

3. I’d be more interested in seeing Diane Keaton struggle with menopause and motherhood for two hours if there were a saucy black character who is fat and hilarious – $9 million

4. Well, we got the message, and it is: originality and creativity are dead and buried in a fat suit six feet under ground – $7.2 million

5. This movie has seriously been in the top 5 since, like, Thanksgiving. Ben Stiller and Robin Williams get wacky in a magical museum. We get it. Enough already – $5.7 million