New York Comedian and former Rachael Ray fan Sara Jo Allocco had the opportunity to see Ray live and in person at a taping of her popular daytime talk show. It is during this taping that Sara discovered a truly awful secret: Rachael Ray is a huge, huge bitch. What follows is her report of the experience, where Ray ignored the crowd, acted like a c***, and caused a group of friendly travelers to miss their flight home. It reads as a warning to mid-Western housewives everywhere: Avoid this show at all costs!

This Tuesday, a friend and I headed over to a midtown Manhattan studio to attend a very special taping of The Rachael Ray Show. Now, I know a lot of people can’t stand Rachael Ray. In fact, I feel like MOST people can’t stand her, but I actually like watching her cook because her meals are very easy (i.e., a chimp like me can make them with little to no, make that no, effort). I will say that I was a bit worried when I read the e-mail and it said to be prepared to be there for “several hours”. I mean, how much of this woman’s “EVOO’s” and “I Know, RIGHT!?’s” can one person take?

We arrived and stood outside in the cold, at 1pm (check-in was at 2:15). After being selected off of the line by one of the many PA’s, we were happily whisked away to another holding area with a group of Pennsylvania housewives who made a big trip to NYC, complete with lunch at Bubba Gump Shrimp. My friend and I pushed our way to the one small heater in the hallway, hogging up the vital toe-thawing area. Finally, after nearly melting my knee-high leather boot into my leg, I decided it was time for them to let us in. After all it was like 3pm at this point. So the line slowly starts making its way thru security (honestly they have better security at this show than at Laguardia), which then leads to an elevator, which then leads to… her set?! Not even close. Another holding cell. Fear not: They had Rachael Ray approved Dunkin Donuts coffee (that was already gone) and Sara Lee muffins that could thoughtfully also be used to fix any wall cracks that may pop up.

Eventually, we were seated on her set and the warm up comic comes out. He’s adorable and funny and he deserves an Emmy and a Dunkin Donut’s endorsement deal; hands down, he was the highlight of the show. In fact the crew was lovely and friendly.

My beef is with Ms. Ray herself. When Rachael came out for her first bit (they taped three different show segments so, she had three different wardrobe changes), she simply walked onto the set as if to say, “Yeah I’m here. Let’s f**king start people”. In fact, I could be wrong, but she may have actually come right out and said that.

Anywho, as I’m about to whisper “What a bitch” to my friend, she beats me to it. I nod in agreement. This continues on for the duration of time Rachael Ray is in front of us. She never warmed up to the crowd, and barely made eye contact. I couldn’t help feel disappointed. Almost like that time when I was 7 and I accidentally walked into the dressing room at Chuck E. Cheese’s and saw Mr. Munch (my favorite character) with his head off scratching his balls. Now, I’m not expecting Ray Ray to be the loud, bubbly, cookie monster sounding maniac she appears to be on television. Nor do I expect her to personally shake each and every one of our hands and exchange recipes. I also know how TV works, and that it must be stressful and tiring to shoot three different episode segments, cook all day, and keep up this bubbly “I’m the cutest” personality. But for the money she makes, she can punch it up a bit more. It almost seemed like she was annoyed that we were even there, that she was put in this position to make millions in order to please the always-hungry masses. Well Eff That Ess! Bone up, Ray, it’s Shobiz!

All in all, I can’t say I was totally surprised, because I’m never surprised when a “celebrity” turns out to be an a**hole. Hell they’re human. But I didn’t run into her in the pasta aisle of Whole Foods and demand a photo… I went to see her freaking show. But I can’t complain nearly as much as the row of women who missed their flight back home to Middle America. That’s gotta suck worse than Rachael’s “Rayisms” and self proclaimed “Awesomeness.”

Next time I’m on the verge of catching hypothermia, it will be for Martha Stewart, plain and simple.

Ed. Note: Someone, forward this to the Rachael Ray Sux LJ Community ASAP!