- CLAIM: Angelina Jolie says she found the all the attention devoted to her recent sudden weight loss “disturbing.” She then broke her left foot off and began gnawing at the meat, blood smeared down her face, screaming at the reporter “What the f**k are you looking at?!?” (US Magazine) (Photo via Worth 1000)
- TINY NEWS: Did Kelly Ripa storm out on her husband Mark Consuelos? Or, more importantly, did she just take tiny, fast inch-long steps towards the door? Because I don’t think it’s really possible to storm out of anywhere when you’re under 5 feet tall. Semantics aside, she obviously did. (Popbytes)
- POP ART, JOE SIMPSON STYLE: Need a little end of day heartwarming? Perhaps the Simpson Family Greeting Card will do the trick! (Ed. Note: It won’t.) (Gallery of the Absurd)
- WHY DOES GOD LET PEOPLE MAKE BABIES AND NOT BE IN LOVE?: It’s the weirdest thing: Jamie Lynn Spears‘ boyfriend Casey Aldridge, who was in love enough with the young Nickelodeon star to “put it on her”, is like, sooooo not psyched about his future spawn. (Life & Style)
- NEWS ONLY 5 OF YOU WILL CARE ABOUT: Matt Keough, former star of the third best reality show on TV right now, The Real Housewives of the O.C., was arrested for violating his probation by throwing back a drink at a Marriott bar. Son Shane, on the other hand, remains an a-hole, while separate ex-wife Jeanna stays surprisingly awesome (in comparison, mind you). (TMZ)
