From COMEDY CENTRAL INSIDER — The best part of the time after Thanksgiving is the beginning of the Year End Roundups! Start the listing season off right with the Geek Year in Review with The Hard ‘N Phirm. Read the thick-framed hilarity, after the jump!
Exclusive! The Hard ‘N Phirm Geek Year in Review: Biggest Crime Against Geeks
(To prepare you for Last Laugh ‘07, our
year-end celebration of things that happened in ‘07 (airing this Sunday and starring Lewis Black, Dave Attell and D.L. Hughley), we’ve asked Chris Hardwick and Mike Phirman of he comedy/parody musical duo Hard ‘N Phirm to report here each week on what the GEEKS were up to this year. Last week, they announced the Geek of the Year. This week, they finger the perpetrator of the Biggest Crime Against Geeks.)
HARD: So, I hate to take it negative, but I think we’d be remiss not to crown the year’s biggest crime against geeks.
PHIRM: I’m for it. Ever since nerdiness has become "fashionable", there has definitely been a diluting of the geek image.
HARD: I know! I got stuffed in a trashcan because I brought my Atari 2600 game cartridges to school. So, in essence, I suffered so some douchey 20-year old could wear an Atari T-shirt.
PHIRM: So really, there are two ways to evaluate who the biggest perpetrator is: he or she who made the biggest mess out of what was a great trophy of geekdom, or he or she who put forth the lamest image of what it is to be a geek.
HARD: I’m going to have to throw my vote in favor of the many geek-racist sitcoms that cluttered the airwaves this year like Chuck and The Big Bang Theory.
PHIRM: Yeah, all the pictures from The Big Bang Theory feature good-looking guys dressed silly and looking smug. It’s like when Spanish shows take a hot girl and put her in glasses and call it "La Fea Chica" (trans: The Ugly Chick).
HARD: I’m more disturbed when Spanish shows take middle-aged dudes and put them in school clothing.
PHIRM: Claro que si. Now, I ask you this: what’s worse? The aforementioned false representation and subsequent exploitation of geeks, or… what Michael Bay did to the Transformers movie? That movie should have had a thing in the credits that says "All Transformer Fans Were Harmed In the Making of This Film."
HARD: Probably the Michael Bay thing. And there’ll be sequels ‘cause that movie generated enough cash to fill a thousand Optimus Primes (in truck form). Then Prime transforms back into humanoid form and sh*ts the money onto Bay’s lawn.
PHIRM: That movie’s like being a kid again and having your dumb, big neighbor kid steal and break one of your favorite toys. (And get paid for it.)
HARD: What do you think the devil gets in return when Michael Bay dies?
PHIRM: A best friend.
HARD: So we’re going with Transformers as this year’s heartiest geek transgression? I’m cool with that.
PHIRM: As am I. (Side note: Would you transgress more if every time you did it, you heard the "transforming" SFX?)
HARD: I think perhaps the [ooh-ah-ee-ah-ooh] sound played over some of the transgressions in this chat may help keep us from getting our asses kicked by Michael Bay or Latinos next time we’re in public.
PHIRM: Agorironichatiphobia: n. the fear of getting beat up in a public place for ironic comments made in a chat space.
HARD: I now see the error in giving you "Son of Sniglets" for your birthday. That old book dealer warned me there’d be consequences, but I thought he was just a kooky old loon.
PHIRM: Now I’m going to get you a Michael Bay T-shirt.
* Catch up with Hard ‘N Phirm on their website: Hard ‘N Phirm Industries
* Watch their videos on MySpace
* Hard ‘N Phirm will be back to celebrate another Geek aspect of 2007 this Thursday.
