Nice try with the dress codes and no-arguing-policies, David Stern, because Allen Iverson’s entourage beating up two dudes because they wouldn’t leave the VIP section of a Washington nightclub just restored the NBA’s thuggish image one millionfold. Marlin Godfrey was awarded $260,000 in his lawsuit against the Nuggets superstar, and though he claims Iverson’s posse inflicted “long-term health damage” upon him, there are more than a few aspects of this story that are hilarious:
1 - The original target amount of the lawsuit was $20 million. Apparently, Godfrey thought he had been assaulted by Isaiah Thomas.
2 - “The jury found that [Iverson posse member Jason] Kane was liable for assaulting Godfrey, who was awarded $250,000 for pain and suffering and $10,000 for his medical bills. Iverson was found negligent for failing to supervise Kane.” Apparently, members of your entourage must be supervised on a strict “Lennie from Of Mice and Men” policy, meaning Iverson must now rectify the situation by telling Kane about the rabbits and shooting him (literary spoiler alert!)
3 - I can’t help but picture Kane from WWE as the bodyguard.
4 - “The suit also accused Kane of assault and battery for allegedly beating Godfrey with items that included a bottle.” Why would he need a frickin’ bottle?? Did he think he was fighting a boss from “Streets of Rage?” Were there no pipes or samurai swords within reach?
5 - “[Iverson bodyguard Terrance] Williams was not working for Iverson that night and was not included in the lawsuit, but Godfrey and Kittrell tried to prove that he has been a de facto security guard for Iverson in the past. They showed jurors an excerpt of the MTV practical joke show “Punk’d” in which Williams is seen handling security duties during a set-up of Iverson. Williams said he was merely hamming up for the camera.”
The July Hilarity Score So Far: NBA Offseason 1, MLB Regular Season 0
