- Our beloved Knut the Polar Bear has gone from cute little fuzzball to insatiable devourer of manflesh in what seems like only a matter of months. They really do grow up so fast, don’t they?
- Some clueless old guy’s book about how “the Internets are stupid and wrong” describes bloggers as “enthusiastic monkeys who try to steal away our eyeballs”. I agree completely, except for the part about enthusiasm. And not only do I want to steal your eyeballs, I want to EAT THEM!
- When some college girl dropped her cellphone into a toilet and got a new number, it turned out to be the same recently-discarded digits owned previously by Paris Hilton, predictably resulting in hilarious hijinx, mad-cap mix-ups and a whole lot of disturbing dirty talk from creepy, heavily-breathing old men (even ones who weren’t the heiress’ father). Oh well, I suppose there are worse things one could “inherit” from Paris.
- Yes hippies, I know it’s 125 degrees in parts of California right now, but before we all start screaming “Global Warming!” and drunk driving our Priuses in despair, consider the fact that, on a lot of other planets in our solar system, 125 degrees is downright frigid. So just turn up the oil-powered AC unit, be glad you don’t live on Mars, and quit your b*tchin’!
- Here are all the hilarious reasons why celebrities make everything even better than they already are.
- The Twheel could be the future of tires, that is if its name didn’t sound so wussy.
