While the world worries themselves sick about whether or not Lindsay Lohan will avoid ODing before the age of 30, we’ve got a much more pressing matter at hand: Lindsay Lohan will be turning 21 years old on July 2! Assuming she’s not Ronsoning it up in prison somewhere following this weekend’s DUI charge (with a sprinklin’ of cocaine possession), Lindsay is planning on having a big bash at Las Vegas hotspot Pure. And while the starlet is now confirmed in rehab, chances are she’ll be out of there before July 2.
Now, for most normal young ladies, a 21st birthday party is a time to celebrate finally being old enough to drink legally, by basically drinking your face off and praying to God a friend will make sure you don’t take a dirtnap in a ditch somewhere. It’s the one night most people use to party harder than any other birthday.
But Lindsay parties that way on a nightly basis — meaning her 21st birthday party is going to be totes blase… unless. Unless Lohan really steps it up a crotch in partyspeak and turns her 21st bday out into the wildest, most insane kiki imaginable, i.e. a truly unforgettable experience. Here are 5 creative ways Lindsay can celebrate her 21st birthday to make for an unforgettable evening!
1. Strap on a helmet, don your Herbie the Lovebug garb, and shoot out of a cannon. Rather than landing on some inflatable pillow, celebrate the big two-one by dropping into a lake of vodka. Setting the like on fire would be a nice touch.
2. 21 means it’s finally legal to gamble… so why not your entire savings? Prove you’ve got balls bigger than Shanna Moakler’s when you put your Parent Trap loot on the roulette line. Blank check it up, place it on red (obvs), and test fate. Think of it this way: If you lose, your parents will finally leave you alone for good.
3. Dangling party! No one is allowed to walk on the floor, and you may only move around by way of hanging gymnastic rings (a la the American Gladiators game “Hang Tough”.) Prove that your serious by placing a ravenous Nicole Richie and Keira Knightley on the ground. If you drop, you’re slop.
4. Play shuffleboard at a retirement community while sipping rasberry spritzers and gossiping about the local 88-year-old floozy, only to complain of the heat and retire for a 4 pm nap.
5. Fly to Costa Rica with your best buds, and eat as many random looking rainforest leaves as you can take. You’ll either be poisoned to death, or end up the Queen of a land full of dwarf horses dressed up like harajuku girls. Which is a great way to ring in the new “adult” you!
