Oh this is just too awesome. A feud has broken out between former Dynasty co-stars and current old biddies Joan Collins (age 73) and Linda Evans (age 64). The two, who used to have sweet-assed catfights on TV, just finished touring the country in a play called Legends. In a plot that’s a bit too close to home, the two played faded stars who hate each other, but have a chance to make a comeback if they work together. As part of the script, there is some on-stage fighting. But apparently it got out of hand and now there’s just some good old fashioned name calling going on. As Page Six reports:
“Joan ended the tour with a sprained knee, a scar on her hand and almost choked to death,” a rep for Collins told Page Six.“Evans kicked Joan’s hand so hard that she now has a permanent scar and cannot wear a ring on her right hand. And she spent five weeks in therapy when Evans took it too far and allegedly pushed her off the stage.”
Nonsense, says Evans’ manager, Mike Greenfield. “Joan Collins is the biggest [bleeping] sack of [bleep]. She’s the single most unprofessional actress working in Hollywood,” he told us. “Linda Evans hurting somebody? I find it unbelievable.”
Oh damn! That guy just called Joan Collins a [bleeping] sack of [bleep]! How uncalled for! How awesome! This catfight will no doubt only escalate from here. And I’ll be sitting back and enjoying it. If I can just make one plea: Can we have a little more originality in our name calling please, ladies? You are two of history’s most epic divas, let’s make the slurs a bit more creative. Below are some of my suggestions for names you can hurl at each:
- Rotting diva husk
- Shriveled fame humper
- Aging Hollywood abscess
- Grandma McBitchy
- Old Lady Couldabeen
- The Cryptkeeper
- Rusting failure magnet
- Mildewed panties on the fetid corpse of Old Hollywood
- Stagnating colostomy bag of regret
Have any insults of your own? Put them in the comments section!
