- SHOCKER… MAYBE THE DIRTY KIND: MSNBC’s Keith Olbermann is reported to be a terrible lover and a cad by an embittered ex-lover. On the bright side, Larry King can finally empty his own colostomy bag. Take that, Olbermann! (Page Six)
- MARKETING GENIUS: Even the characters on Two and a Half Men can’t make it through an entire episode without getting sh*z-hammered. We usually black out by minute 17. (USA Today)
- BLAME GAME: Billy Bush claims he was on the phone with Eva Longoria when she took her rib-fracturing spill last week. Considering we once sliced a bagel all the way through our forearm while watching the guy on the red carpet, we’ll buy this one. (People Magazine)
- RETRO CLIP: Remember when Super Mario Brothers was cutting edge technology? No? Well back in 1988 it blew Bill O’Reilly’s mind. (College Humor)
- BREAKING NEWS: Heidi Klum, full with fetus, still looks drop dead gorgeous. We still can’t decide whether or not this is proof that God exists. Give us time. (X17 Online)
