As you may already know, when Shaquille O’Neil isn’t intimidating people in a basketball uniform, he’s doing so in a police uniform. In the offseason, the star of such film as Kazaam is a reserve officer with the Miami Beach Police Department. Details today are emerging about Shaq’s involvement in a botched child pornography sting last month. (Please stop reading for a moment and let that idea absorb.) On September 23, Shaq & Co. raided a man’s house, sending in a “‘paramilitary search-and-seizure team’ that took computers, cameras, DVDs and VHS tapes.” Turns out, an IP address snafu meant that they raided the wrong guy! And while Shaq denied any involvement, the current face of Miami’s Anti-Child Pornography and Child Predator Campaign finally fessed up to being in the man’s house at the time. (Neighbors saw his head sticking out of a chimney.)
Which gave us an idea for a serious hit show: To Catch a Predator with Shaq. It’s the exact same show as the original Dateline show, except instead of Chris “Whitebread” Hanson, you have Shaq coming out from behind the wall and watch the perps reaction. That, or a bumbling half-hour cop comedy featuring Shaq getting into all kinds of pickles, like a Bronson Pinchot for the new millenium.
